The following article was published in ADDvisor newsletter earlier this year. We are publishing this article in our newsletter with kind permission from Alan Graham and Bill Benninger of ADDvisor.
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TIPS ON THE MANAGEMENT OF ADULT ADD
Edward Hallowell, MD and John Ratey, MD have listed 50 tips or practical suggestions for the management of adult ADHD. These are non-medication suggestions. Over the next few months, we will share these very useful strategies that Drs. Hallowell and Ratey have proposed. They are divided into four categories:
PART I - Insight and Education
1. Be sure of the diagnosis.Choose a professional who truly understands ADHD and its related disorders2. Educate yourself.
Understand ADHD. Read books. Talk to professionals. Gather information. Learn.3. Coaching
Get yourself a coach. A coach can help you get and stay organized, stay on task, give you encouragement and be in your corner..4. Encouragement.
Adults with ADHD need lots of encouragement. Find people who understand you and encourages you to reach your goals.5. Realize what ADHD is NOT!
ADHD is not a psychological conflict. It is not because you and your mother don't get along.6. Educate and involve others.
Teach others around you about what ADHD is and what they can do to help. This can include family, friends, coworkers, even your boss.7. Give up guilt over high-stimulating behavior.
Understand you are drawn to this type of thing. Try to make better decisions, don't "beat yourself up" about the bad decisions.8. Listen to feedback from trusted others.
Individuals with ADHD are poor self-observers. Information from others you trust can help you.9. Consider joining or starting a support group.
Much of the information you need is in the minds and experience of other people. Bring these people together for support and increased knowledge. With new technology, telephone groups, like the ADDvisor, can be helpful in providing this support. (Write us!)10. Try to get rid of the negativity.
Many of you have heard negative feedback for ages making it hard to accept the positive. Psychotherapy may help with this.11. Don't feel chained to conventional careers or conventional ways of coping.
Give yourself permission to be yourself. Give up on what you thought you SHOULD be and explore what you REALLY WANT to be.12. Remember what you have is a neurobiological condition.
ADHD is caused by biology. It is how your brain is wired. It is NOT a disorder of will or moral fiber. Weakness of character has nothing to do with it. It is rooted in biology.13. Try to help others with ADHD.
By helping others, you learn more yourself and feel good about helping others.
PART II - Performance Management
1. External structureStructure is the hallmark of the management of ADHD. Use lists, notes to yourself, color-coding, rituals, reminders, files. The PDAs (personal digital assistants) such as the Palm, Handspring Visor, etc. are very helpful organizers.2. Color-coding.
Many ADHD people are visually oriented and color can help call attention to things, thus making them easier to remember.3. Use pizzazz.
In keeping with #2, make your environment as peppy as you want without overwhelming you.4. Set up your environment to reward rather than to deflate.
A deflating environment (remember what it was like in school) will hinder motivation. Try to set things up so you are not constantly reminded of your limitations.5. Acknowledge and anticipate.
Expect that a certain percentage of your projects undertaken, relationships entered into and obligations incurred with collapse.6. Embrace challenges
ADHD people thrive on challenges. As long as you are realistic about success (see #5), give it a shot. You'll get more done.7. Make deadlines
Think of deadlines as motivators rather than echoes of doom. Make them and stick to them. Use your PDA to remind you of them.8. Break down large tasks into small ones.
Attach deadlines to the small tasks and then the large ones get done. Large tasks may feel overwhelming. Smaller tasks are more manageable.9. Prioritize
Put first things first. Procrastination is the enemy of adults with ADHD. Watch out for it and avoid it.10. Accept fear of things going too well
Accept feeling edgy when things seem too easy. Try not to shake things up just for some stimulation.11. Notice how and where you work best
Individuals with ADHD often do their best in the oddest situations. Learn what is best for you: working in front of the TV and stereo, in a crowded room, etc.12. Know that it is okay to do two things at once.
Often, people with ADHD need to be doing several things at once in order to do anything at all.13. Do what you are good at
Even if it seems easy, try to do the things you are good at and not only what you are bad at.14. Leave time between engagements to gather your thoughts
Transitions are difficult for people with ADHD so scheduling breaks in between can help make the transition easier.15. Keep a notepad in your car, by your bed, and in your pocketbook or jacket.
You never know when a good idea will hit you or when you need to remember something.16. Read with a pen in hand.
Use the pen to jot down "margin" notes but also any other idea that may come to you.
PART III - Mood Management
1. Have structured "blow-out" time.Set aside time every week to just "let go" safely. Pick an activity that you enjoy and let loose without getting into trouble.2. Recharge your batteries
This is related to the above tip. On a daily basis, take some time out to recharge your batteries: take a nap, a bath or watch TV. Designate this time as special so as to make it guilt free.3. Choose "good" helpful addictions
Such as exercise. Many ADHD adults get hooked on something. Make it something positive.4. Understand mood changes
Rather than trying to figure out why you are in a bad mood or look for someone to blame, focus on learning to tolerate a bad mood. You know it will pass and by developing strategies, you can help it pass more quickly. Doing something different, such as getting involved in some new activity can help.5. Recognize the ADHD mood cycle.
a. something 'startles' your psychological system, a change, a transition, a disappointment or even success. It can be quite trivial.b. This startle is followed by a 'mini-panic' with a sudden loss of perspective. The world has been turned on its end.
c. You try to deal with this by obsessing over some part of the situation for hours, sometimes days or weeks.
6. Plan scenarios to deal with the inevitable 'blahs.'
Have a list of friends you can call. Have some videos that can distract you. Have some access to exercise. Rehearse some pep talks for yourself. These are the ADD blues. They will pass, you will be okay.7. Expect depression after success.
People with ADD often feel depressed after a big success. This is because the high stimulus of the challenge or preparation is over. The stimulus is gone and so depressed feelings emerge.8. Learn symbols, slogans, sayings
These are short hand ways to label slip-ups, mistakes or mood swings. Such as, "Oops, there goes my ADHD again." This is not an excuse but rather a way to avoid obsessing over your unconscious desire to sabotage yourself.9. Use 'time-outs' as with children
When you are feeling overwhelmed or upset, give yourself a time out. Go away. Calm down.10. Learn to advocate for yourself
Learn to get off the defensive and be appropriately assertive for what you need to be successful.11. Avoid premature closure of a project, a conflict, a deal, or a conversation.
Don't "cut to the chase" too soon, even though you might want to.12. Try to let the successful moment last.
Remember it. Train yourself to consciously and deliberately do this because you can easily forget your successes.13. Remember that ADD usually includes a tendency to overfocus or hyperfocus at time.
This can be used constructively or destructively. Be aware of its destructive use: the tendency to obsess over some problem that you cannot let go.14. Exercise vigorously and regularly
Schedule this into your life and stick to it. It helps work off excess energy and aggression in a positive way. It stimulates the hormonal and neurochemical system in a most therapeutic way and soothes and calms the body. Make it fun so you will stick with it over your lifetime.
PART IV - Interpersonal Life
1. Make a good choice in a significant other.
With the right mate, an ADD adult can thrive.2. Learn to joke with yourself and others.
The more you can have a sense of humor and be relaxed you can be with your symptoms such as getting lost, being tactless, forgetfulness, the more others will be able to be forgiving.3. Schedule activities with friends.
Adhere to these schedules faithfully. Keeping connected to people is critical.4. Find and join groups.
People with ADD find great strength from group support. They feel liked, appreciated, understood and enjoyed.5. Don't stay too long where you aren't appreciated or understood.
ADD people become drained and demoralized by negative groups.6. Pay compliments. Notice other people.
Work on building your social skills. Using a coach enhances this.7. Set social deadlines.
Just as you set dates and deadlines and structure other parts of your life, do so with your social life. Keep up with your social calendar. This will help you keep in touch with friends and the kind of social support that you need.